i'm dragging a heart that weighs a ton / holding out for not just anyone

[monoceroscaeli]

[Fontaine: The technological hub of Teyvat.

For as long as anyone can remember, the country of Fontaine has always been the innovative center for the continent. High speed rail was originated here, and now spans across the entirety of Teyvat and beyond. High rises and skyscrapers pepper the skyline, modern Victorian buildings supporting a gear-like aesthetic from an era gone by. A thousand years ago, it was a much different place, but now it thrives with the bright lights and bustle of its people. One can hear the occasional street performer playing for cash, as businessmen and tourists alike walk down narrow cobblestone streets. People are buried in their phones, some take pictures as they gawk at the sights of the city, but one young man in particular walks languidly down the street, enjoying the life around him. He's in no hurry to get where he's going, as he has plenty of time to get there, noting a deli across the street from where he is now that he'll have to try.

Unfortunately, he is on business, so that'll have to wait.

Never being one to be dressed completely formal, he wears a comfortable pair of slacks and dress shoes, with a collared shirt that isn't buttoned up all the way under a grey vest. Various pieces of metal are woven into the vest, notably a crest on his right shoulder with a chain attached to it that hangs under his arm to the back. On his belt lies a Vision, glowing blue with hydro. The young man always seems friendly and easy going, but what lies underneath is something that not many are allowed to know- the heir to the family business of a company who develops tech for various products is also the right hand man of the mafia that runs the city.

And, their true business behind the scenes; creating Delusions to sell on the black market.

Today is a day where some investigating has to be done, and he's headed to see an old friend of his, from university. One that he's sure can help him with this problem he has. Entering the building, he swings in quietly to give a polite wave and a smile to the only person there.

Someone who looked exactly like their brother, whom he can only assume is the twin sister he'd yet to meet that he'd heard about.]

Hello, I was wondering if Aether was in today? I had a...business proposal for him, and I'm sure that he'd love to hear it. Unless of course, you might be of assistance instead.

Comments

[monoceroscaeli]

[It's his turn to roll his eyes at her, since she clearly doesn't know what she's talking about. She still thinks this is all his fault. Fine, whatever.]

Do you really think the remains of dead gods are used? That might of been true a thousand years ago, but we're in a modern age now. Besides, if your clients die, who's going to buy more?

[He sighs. It doesn't matter to him that Lumine knows. Aether knows too, and if Aether gets in trouble she will anyway by extension.]

I know what you're thinking, and it's not that. I've been wearing mine for several years now and I've never had a single issue. Been in contact with several people, never heard a report about it from anyone else, you understand. Not a vision or a strange dream to be seen, until I met you. So out of all the people who own one, and we're the first to experience dreams and visions. 'Delusion' doesn't mean actual mental delusions, Lumine.

[He wears another exasperated look- he doesn't want to hear her sass.]

And please take all that seriously, will you? The sooner we figure this out, the better.

[traversal]

[ could've fooled her, really, considering the kind of delusion that seems to infect him whenever he's around her. you'd think he's possessed by aether's soul with the way he excitedly tries to befriend her.

lumine remains silent for a few moments, poking at the bamboo shoots currently floating around in her soup. going through the events in the past week, the things that they've both experienced. it always happens when they're together, doesn't it? she didn't exactly refute his claim, seeing that it's the same with her; she just didn't exactly admit to it, either. ]

You know ... [ she starts slowly, looking up from her food. not at ajax, but at the distance past the railings of the inn. ] We both don't have to deal with this if we don't see or meet with each other.

[ her gaze flickers at him, watching his reaction and expression, before she looks away once more. ]

Like you said, it only happens when I'm around, right? Never when you're alone, never when you're with someone else. [ only when she's in his proximity, only when she's present, then the visions start and the heaviness of feelings settle in. ] And it's not like there's any reason for us to see each other, either.

[monoceroscaeli]

[The reaction she sees is that his eyes seem to soften at the corners, looking off somewhere else when he considers the idea of never seeing her again. He hates to admit it, but he knows if they choose that path, he won't be satisfied or happy. He doesn't know why, it's not as if he's in love with her- it was Childe, who was in love, clearly. With a girl who shares the same face and name with the woman sitting next to him.]

Is that really what you want, though? To never see each other again, after all those experiences? I don't think you would have made the trip to that bridge if that was the case.

[Ajax's hand comes up to bury half of his face in his hand, letting it rest in his palm, expression frustrated. Not with her, just with the entire situation.]

The dreams don't stop, I know I dream of it almost every night, I just can't remember it afterward. That Childe guy...he was real. I found him doing some research.

[He turns to her, face still resting in his palm, wondering if she's even cared to listen to him.]

[traversal]

[ once again, lumine doesn't really say anything for a while. not because she has nothing to say, but because she has so much to say about it that she doesn't know if she'll stop until she's dissuaded him from pursuing this path or hurt him in some way. and as much of an asshat he is for involving her twin to whatever nefarious business his family has and for twisting her wrist, she also doesn't want to be an asshat like him.

she sighs under her breath. she's given him the way out; why can't he just take it like how a normal person would? ]

What are you even hoping to find out at the end of all this?

[ honestly, what is even at the end of all this? she admittedly has a few. theories, all of which she refuses to voice out because of how absurd they are—and because the last thing she wants is to be proven how right she was.

which she doesn't want to be. ]

So, he's real and is, for some reason, haunting you. But so what? You'll let a ghost bully you into doing what it wants?

[monoceroscaeli]

He's not bullying me, [Ajax replies, sighing at her.] It's not like this is just about me, or Childe. There's still the question of that girl. You know, the one that shares your face, voice and name?

[He would like to remind her of that. That bothered him just as much as the existence of Childe, if not more so. He's not even sure, at this point, that this guy from the past even looked like him- he's only had the point of view through his eyes. He wore black gloves, and a grey and white uniform of some sort, with a mask. He assumes he does, perhaps he should ask her...

He picks up a chopstick and pokes at another jade parcel, still considering her words. He doesn't know what he wants, or what he's looking for at the end of all of this. He hasn't thought that far ahead, it's been more of a passion project so to speak with no clear way to solve it. Not like making sure their enemies are well taken care of or business deals that continue the power his family holds over the city, and beyond. He looks over to her, as lost as one could be in a situation like this.]

I just want to know who these people were, and why us. I look like him, don't I? Why do we look like them, sound like them.

[His eyes turn downward, clearly bothered by it all, finally giving up and stabbing the jade parcel with his chopstick and popping it in his mouth.]

[traversal]

[ that poor jade parcel ... lumine stares at the abuse he's putting his food through, all because he sucks at using the chopsticks. still, she lets him figure it out on his own—if he'll even figure it out by the end of their dinner. chances are, more jade parcels will meet their end with the tapered end of his sticks from his lack of knowledge and dexterity. ]

Nope, looks nothing like you.

[ he looks everything like him, from his blue eyes to that unusual streak of blond in his ginger hair. even their smiles are even identical, down to the way it dimples at the corner of his mouth, which is eerie, she has to admit.

but, seeing that she's on a roll at the moment in trying to dismiss this topic: ]

This Childe is pretty handsome and charming. Blond, green-eyed, dimpled cheek, very sweet face—the kind most mothers would like for a son-in-law.

[monoceroscaeli]

Oh? No wonder your doppleganger seemed to be so in love with him then.

[He stabs yet another jade parcel, eating that swiftly. He's not so sure if the Lumine from the vision was in love, but he can tell an insult when he hears it. She's already gotten flustered in the past with Aether teasing her, and now he's just trying to get the same reaction for that little jab at his looks. He's cute and charming too and he knows it. Uses it to his advantage all the time.]

Does that mean you fell for him too already? [He smirks, not being able to help himself to tease her just a little.] Ah, love at first sight really is a beautiful thing, isn't it...

[He tries with the chopsticks again, his mood lifted for a moment. But he still fails, not being able to get the top one to stay still to grab another parcel.]

[traversal]

[ debatable, but people normally likes to think themselves as good-looking. so lumine chalks up his response to that—and the fact that she was right, after all, in thinking that he's the type who likes to look at himself in the mirror. this conversation says a lot about him in that regard.

she deftly picks up one of her own jade parcels, her chopsticks effortlessly holding onto the spot where it's bundled up together. ]

I don't usually go for looks when I go out with someone.

[ a shrug, as she tries to move all the little dumplings from one plate to another. ]

I also don't like it if they're too cocky or self-important because of how they look like. They're probably too high maintenance, you know.

[monoceroscaeli]

[He watches her pick her food up, and his nose wrinkles when he tries to put his hands in the same position as hers. Now she's just making fun of him a little bit, so that empowers him to try a little harder. He tries again, managing to lift it maybe a foot off the plate before it falls again, and he sighs in defeat. Why are chopsticks so hard to use...]

That's probably true, [he admits, though he doesn't think that applies to him, which is what he believes she's suggesting.]

But I wouldn't say that true of every person who's aware of their own looks. Sometimes it's because they have complete confidence in their abilities, or something completely different. You like to read, you know you can't judge a book by its cover. I'd dare say you can't fully judge it even by the first one hundred pages. Some books get pretty interesting by the time you reach it halfway, and all the set up before hand and foreshadowing really pulls you in once the author has decided to reveal more of the plot.

[Time to finish off his soup, pausing to eat a little of it before it gets too cold.]

Anyway, I still implore you to come with me down to that bridge. If nothing happens, I'll consider your suggestions a little more before I decide to go on a wild goose chase.

[traversal]

[ to compare himself to a book—he really is very self-important, isn't he, pretty much proving her words, even highlighting it and putting a bold, black underline beneath it. unsurprising and quite predictable, and very much disappointing as usual. very typical too. ]

If the author fails to capture the reader's interest in under a hundred pages, then the fault isn't with the reader but the author for being a poor writer. They can't blame the reader for setting aside their book because they got tired or were presented something they didn't like. Because there's so many books and so little time that a reader shouldn't have to sit through and read one hundred pages of boring world building and bank on a fifty-fifty chance of an exciting plot or continuous tedium. If I wanted to gamble, I would.

[ she, for one, doesn't. with so little time for herself, she does want to spend it wisely on something enjoyable, something fun.

lumine finishes her shrimp balls before she hails a waitstaff for a pot of tea. ]

I'll come with you, but whether or not something happens, I don't want to get involved with this or with you any longer. I don't need to know who this Childe is or who this other Lumine is.

[monoceroscaeli]

Hah. A sharp wit and a sharp tongue.

[Her retort only makes him smile, finally finishing off his food. The chopsticks were never learned well enough to ever pick something up to get to his mouth without dropping it, so he sticks to stabbing to finish them off.]

Either way, I appreciate you agreeing to at least come with for this little trip with me. I guess we'll find out if there's more to it there or not...

[He chews thoughtfully on his last parcel, thinking.]

Though, the prospect of potentially finding something is a little exciting. It is, after all, the reason I'm here. Hey, maybe we'll discover some sort of ancient secret within these visions, haha. Maybe that'll give you reason enough to keep searching for answers.

[traversal]

It won't, [ she tells him flatly as she takes a sip of her tea.

lumine might be jumping to conclusions hastily, but it doesn't matter. this has gone for far too long with far too many complicated twists and turns. she thought dealing with aether's company is complicated enough, but clearly, this takes the cake.

in any case, she gets up from her seat once she finishes her tea. the sooner they get this over with, the sooner she gets rid of him. ]

This is supposed to be a healing trip for my wrist, [ she sighs under her breath, feeling exhaustion that has nothing to do with eating too much. oh, and her sanity, but that's an addendum, really. ] C'mon, get up, before I change my mind in the next two minutes.

[monoceroscaeli]

Alright, alright.

[He stands, having already paid for his meal when she was enjoying her tea, turning toward the exit. He's not sure if she's just agreed to this because he was pestering her about it, or if maybe she is interested, but just doesn't want to deal with him considering the little fiasco back in Fontaine.

Ajax hopes that something will get her to want to follow him down this road. But the only thing now to do is to go to that spot, where Childe and Lumine had spent a nice moment together. When he thinks about it, he wouldn't mind having a nice moment like that with her, too. He laughs at himself for thinking that. As if that could happen.]

Since you know where it is, mind leading the way? I can call a cab if it's far.

[traversal]

What, too rich and spoiled to walk?

[ that's a good suggestion, but lumine quickly weighs the pros and cons of hailing a cab in her head before she starts walking towards the direction of the bridge.

sure, it'll be faster, but she'll also be stuck in a small, enclosed space with him. the last thing she needs is less distance from him, which could potentially trigger another series of visions or whatever. no, walking is preferable, if only bec she can put a few feet's distance from him.

the bridge isn't very far anyway, and the night air is nice and cool from parts of the marshes that still survived after a thousand years. it would've been a pleasant walk, but then, she's stuck with ajax. ]

[monoceroscaeli]

It was just an offer.

[He shrugs, but walking is perfectly fine by him. It is a nice night out, as they set out on their journey down to the bridge. He makes sure to look around and take in the sights of the little suburb of Liyue Harbor, noting how quaint it was.

He doesn't figure she'll be in the mood for talking, so he stays relatively silent for most of the walk over. It's not until they finally reach the bridge that he speaks again, giving it a look over.]

I guess I shouldn't of been expecting the same bridge. I wonder how many times it's been rebuilt since then.

[His hand runs over the metal of the railing, looking up to see how well he could see Dragonspine from here. Buildings and homes litter the landscape now, though the mountaintop does peek above the edge of it all. There's an absence of the nail that floated above the mountain from the vision they'd had, but other than that nothing especially sticks out to him.

He hadn't really known what he was expecting, looking down into what's a river now than a marsh, the water still flowing down from Dragonspine.]

I suppose you were right, after all.

[Ajax looks a little down at the discovery of nothing, turning to her.]

Listen, I know you don't want to have anything to do with me, but...I still want to say thank you, for at least giving this a chance.

[He offers a hand, as some kind of last goodwill gesture.]

I guess it's time we go our separate ways. Partings are special moments, after all. Grant me that I can at least make this one amiable in some way.

[traversal]

[ she's admittedly surprised that nothing happened. though a part of her expected this, another part of her hoped that something would—if only to bring some form of closure to this weird incident between them. maybe that's it, though. maybe that's all there is to it, just visions of a past that never happened to the both of them.

her gaze flickers at dragonspine rising above the rooftops and eaves of the houses littering the once previous marsh. that one remains unchanging, a landscape that's always been unforgiving.

lumine turns back to him at his remark, her eyes dropping to the hand he's offering to her. funny, how he expects her to take it as if he didn't just sprain her other hand some days before. she almost rolls her eyes, even if it's supposedly there to make things "better".

she can't see how that would now. ]

... Wait, [ she pauses, her brows wrinkling. ] Say that again.

[monoceroscaeli]

What?

[He's starting to feel weird with the proffered hand out in public, and he doesn't quite know what to do with it since she hasn't taken it.]

You were right? Thank you? It's time to go our separate ways?

[Those were all things she'd like to hear, right? He looks at her confused, perhaps he'd it at least the right one.]

[traversal]

[ it's true that those are the things she wanted to hear from him, and more, actually. but: ]

No, [ lumine replies with a shake of her head. ] Partings are what?

[ because where has she heard that before? certainly not from aether, not from anything or anywhere recent. and yet it's something that's always resonated with her somehow. she doesn't know why, though she has an inkling as to what might be causing it, but still.

he can keep his hand right there until he's said it. ]

[monoceroscaeli]

Oh, yes.

[He's surprised that's the thing she clung to. It's such a sentimental part of him, one he doesn't show often to other people. So he only smiles warmly and repeats himself.]

Partings are special moments. I wouldn't want to leave with nothing but complete animosity between us, because I think we really get on well, you know?

[Aside from sprained wrists and shady deals.]

It's just too bad things ended like this, is all.

[traversal]

[ she'd argue with him on that. that things would've ended badly anyway, that there would still be animosity growing between them as an eventuality. it just so happens that she's managed to learn about aether's involvement in his family's shady dealings early on. ]

That's what you think.

[ she takes his hand with another heavy sigh. maybe with this, she'll finally be rid of him once and for all. aether just needs to—

her eyes widen when he suddenly disappears in front of her, the landscape completely changing. liyue architecture, the designs very much oriental, but at the same time, she knows this isn't a typical liyuen establishment either. the masked individuals standing at certain points of the room tell her as much, as is the man in a familiar coat.

so you were here the whole time? what are you hiding for?

lumine turns around at the shrill voice, seeing three figures from a distance, her eyes widening just a fraction at the sight. it isn't really the floating little girl that startles her, babbling incessantly, but "lumine", the other lumine—

partings are special moments ... that's not a memory i want to leave him with. ]

What ...

[monoceroscaeli]

[Ajax is pleased when she steps forward to take his hand, grasping it firmly as he always would when greeting someone, whether it be a friend or a business partner.

What he doesn't expect is what happens next, the landscape of Dihua melting away and being replaced with a familiar image he'd seen before in her office, when he'd told her about his siblings while ordering food finally shapes into something familiar, more solid, and vivid. This was the room he'd been talking to those two figures, what he recognizes as that bank. The liyuean architecture gives it away almost immediately, and yet he also recognizes things that are distinctly Snezhnayan in nature. Old, but Snezhnayan.

The bank teller has a mask on, there's a few other people in the bank, and when he hears those voices, his head snaps in that direction. And he's not alone. Lumine is here too, looking as confused and shocked as he felt.

There stands Childe, a spitting image of himself, hair looking like how he wakes up in the morning. Every line and crease in his face mirrors his own, and he's completely unsurprised that Lumine lied to him about this man's appearance. He steps closer to her, too engrossed in what they were saying to give her any guff about it yet, as they continue on.

I should have been the one taking him back. I do have subordinates to escort him, but I still feel a little uneasy.]

That's me...and you again. Who's the little flying fairy there though, I wonder?

[He looks to her, before returning his attention on the trio...]

[traversal]

[ who cares if she lied anyway? for one thing, he's researched about this childe person—or so he claims; he should at least have some idea what he looks like. for another, it's clearly two people in the same shape and form as they are, seeing how this has been going on. ]

I don't know who that is ...

[ lumine has certainly never seen her before, at least not in the visions she's been granted lately. it's always been just her ... and him.

but one thing that really strikes her are the way these conversations seem to go, the way they reflect the current ones they have. which makes her wonder if ajax has known all along and has been leading her by her nose all this time. would it be surprising? no. but would it annoying?

terribly, yes.

she watches as the other lumine's expression soften even just a bit when he mentions about leaving someone in her care and feeling at ease about it, wordlessly expressing his trust towards her. trust that she can't tell she shares right now.

and to think not long ago, we ... ]

Long ago, they what? What??

[ wtf is this cliffhanger? it's like watching a drama. ]

[monoceroscaeli]

[Ajax only shakes his head, jaw still hanging a little open in shock at this entire exchange. Given the interaction from the last vivid vision, he can see why Childe trusts this Lumine so much. He clearly did then, too, if even more so at the time.]

I don't know...he's not saying, either.

[It's like he can tell, that was a subject Childe didn't want to breach at the moment. Probably something unrelated and sensitive, avoiding it in a way he would too. The man in grey continues on, mentioning a fight, a promise of a rematch.

This time, with my honor as a Harbinger on the line.]

Harbinger? Harbinger Childe... [Ajax pinches the bridge of his nose, visibly shaken as to how familiar that was. Lord Childe, Master Childe, Lord Harbinger...why is this all coming to him suddenly?

Hahaha... Regardless of who wins or loses our next bout, I'd also like to invite you over to my home. I'll introduce you to my other siblings, Tonia and Anthon.

They're great kids, and I'm very proud of them both.]

Haven't I said that before? [He looks at her, a frightened confusion on his expression, then suddenly realizing.] Lumine, he was talking about Teucer before...I'd bet you all the mora in my bank account.

[traversal]

[ his mention of his siblings flies over her head for a moment, her thoughts lingering on his declaration of a fight against her.

harbinger ... he called himself a harbinger, which she admittedly has never really heard of before. granted, she's never studied any specific history about snezhnaya, and from the looks of it, it seems that ajax is quite familiar with the word. but it sounds so ... ominous, in a way.

is that his occupation? he sounds just as shady and sketch as his current counterpart. ]

... You've been saying a lot of things he's said, actually.

[ things that seem to struck a chord in her, settle heavily and deeply in her chest and squeeze her heart painfully, every time. and he's using it on her even now.

how unfair.

til we meet again ... now why did those words strike her harder than everything else he's said? it's a question she asks when the scene fades and returns to the marsh, her gaze trained on the white scarf floating behind her counterpart's retreating back. ]

What's ... a Harbinger?

[monoceroscaeli]

[As the vision fades, he watches them go their separate ways. Childe, presumably back to an office or somewhere else in the bank, and Lumine, leaving the bank. His heart is pounding, something he hadn't noticed while viewing the vision, confused as to why this time they had watched it instead of living it like the last one.

He barely realizes she's asked him a question, focused on the fact that Childe has confirmed that he's from Snezhnaya too. There's so much about that that bothers him. His siblings have the same names, the only difference is that Childe is Childe and he's Ajax. Is that his actual name? What is going on...]

...What? Oh...sorry. I was lost in thought for a moment there.

[He rubs his head, thinking.]

I remember reading that Childe was some sort of general in the military when he was alive. But now that I think about it, his title was Harbinger, so I'm guessing that's what a Harbinger is. One of the most powerful people in Snezhnaya, widely feared for his battle prowess.

[He shrugs- that's all he has, right now.]

I didn't have too much time to look deeply into it, but that's the little I gleaned from a few historical websites. I think the paludamentum across his chest suggests that's true. That garb was very much militaristic, don't you think?