insurmountable | i'm dragging a heart that weighs a ton / holding out for not just anyone

[ lumine sits on the other side of the bed, her back turned to him as she removes the ring from her finger and unclasps the watch from her wrist, depositing it on the side table. she makes it an excruciatingly, deliberately slow process, almost like a ritual of sorts. make him wait, make him squirm until he can't take it anymore. ]

Is that your way of telling me that I'm just that good at disrupting your plans?

[ and maybe she should do more of it for the sake of everyone, especially her sanity? what an excellent idea that is, she thinks.

she reaches out behind her, grabbing one of the pillows next to him and setting it lengthwise between the two of them. a fluffy line or wall of sorts, one that keeps them separate as she crawls onto the bed and lies down on her side, her back still towards him. ]

Unlike me with you, you just can't seem to predict these unforeseen circumstances with me, can you?

[Ajax is a very patient man. He sees exactly what she's doing, sitting there watching her as she takes her adornments off and lies down. He keeps his poker face up when she puts the pillow between them, as if they were high school kids on a trip. Snorting, he picks the pillow up and tosses it to the end of the bed, scooting himself over with his own pillow to lie down and press his chest to her back.

His face comes to rest near the nape of her neck, letting his arm drape over her side. This stubborn woman, he wouldn't have it any other way.]

I guess not, [he responds, amused.] But I don't mind it. It's as I said- it makes things a little more interesting.

[He plants a soft kiss to her neck, before nuzzling his head into it.]

I'm not sure how I got so lucky.

[ lumine quickly notices the shift in the mattress, his weight pressing down as he moves closer, looking over her shoulder to see the pillow being tossed aside. ]

Hey—

[ but she turns back around when ajax presses himself against her, his arm slipping over her waist. she can feel the heat of his body emanating from his bare skin and seeping into the thin fabric of her dress, almost like her personal hot water bottle. it feels nice, soothing despite the cool air brushing over her skin from the air-conditioning. her eyes flutter close, lips pressing together when she feels his mouth on her nape. ]

I don't know if it's something that I'd call luck, [ she retorts with an inward roll of her eye. ] You don't bulldoze your way into a person's life and call it luck.

[ because isn't that what he's been doing to her lately? he's just everywhere in her life, orbiting her like some prodigal planet that's returned home. in a way ... isn't that how it is?

her hand slips into his once more, fingers tangling with his to keep it from moving further from her side. keep him in place, as one would say. ]

You sure you didn't enjoy kissing Aether yesterday?

[A soft laugh emits from him, the thought of him bulldozing into her life. He would hardly describe it as such, thinking back to the coincidence after coincidence leading up to this point.]

You say bulldozing, but perhaps it was just fate, haha.

[He seems to sink into her as she tangles her hand with his, his body relaxing completely against her like a tightly wound wire that was finally being unwound. Ajax can already feel his cares drifting away, holding her in his arms as he lets his lips brush against her soft skin as he speaks.]

What kiss. Did you mean these ones?

[Determined not to let the thought of kissing her brother ruin what's in his pants right now, he begins to plant more slow, deliberate kisses to the back of her neck and shoulder blade. Though his hand is trapped by her own, his arm still pulls her inward to him, craving more of her against him. Her warmth lulls him into a sort of fog, where instincts begin to take over rather than logic.]

[ what happened to his game of chicken! what happened to taking a nap!!

lumine squeezes her eyes shut, lower lip between her teeth, as he leaves more kisses on her neck and shoulder. and in his wake, heat seems to bloom where his lips brush against her skin, spreading and radiating throughout her body and settling somewhere deep inside her, until she's just had enough. how are they supposed to rest like this?

she turns around in his arms, pressing her hands once more over his mouth. ]

What happened to your suggestion of resting for a bit? [ she refuses to accept that she's at fault for derailing this idea. ] Are you yielding?

[Ajax's eyes flash in amusement at her, he was wondering when she'd figure out that he decided to play a completely different game than he was. He traps her hands against his mouth, kissing her palms while he gazes back at her from behind her own hands.]

Aren't we resting right now? I'm quite relaxed.

[Is the muffled response, his eyes fluttering closed as he continues to kiss her palms, sighing with content between each press.]

Is it yielding, or just changing the rules of the game?

[ somehow, this sudden turn of events is no longer surprising to her. it's frustrating, as everything related to him is normally frustrating, but it's unsurprising at the same time. his manipulations know no bounds, matching her step for step—at times, even managing to getting ahead of her despite her advantage. that's just how ajax is, never playing fair, much to her dismay.

how annoying, she thinks as her hand instinctively shift against his lips with every kiss he presses against her palm. it's ticklish, to say the least, painting a bit of colour in her cheeks as he continues his ministrations. ]

You don't even know what I did with my hands today ...

[ she could've picked up something dirty early before meeting up with yae. he doesn't know!! ]

Hahahaha...

[The laugh is tinged with hints of the Harbinger that lies within him, relentless now, as he continues to enjoy her efforts to ward him off or get him to concede and stop. His hand leaves her own, to wrap his arm around her as he presses into her more, uncaring for wherever her hands were prior to his kisses. So adamant, she is, in trying to keep herself from being swayed by him. It's a delightful challenge to him, addictive almost.]

I never know what you do with your hands any day, [he counters, now attempting to press his face through her hands to get to her lips.] It's not as if it changes anything.

[Chuckling to himself again, he wonders how she let herself get in such a dangerous position with him. It's all too tempting to let his hand wander to other places, to coax her into letting her explore him as well. But he knows she might have something else up her sleeve, some willpower left to resist before that, so he has to hold off, despite the haze that begins to set in once again.

Something telling him exactly where to press, exactly where to touch. Not now, he thinks, this is too much fun.]

Until you get sick, that is.

[ ugh, how incorrigible. he's really never one to give up, isn't he?

though there's that sinking, familiar feeling in that laugh of his, in the way he insists gently but firmly that she can't seem to brush off, something that makes her chest squeeze tightly, her heart working hard for every beat. it's just like that instance in snezhnaya before it all went up in smoke. so for one long moment, lumine keeps her hands pressed against his mouth and face, before ever so slowly, she lowers them.

her fingers brush against his jaw, tracing its hard edge and following its line until they trail down his neck and chest. pulled against him, she can feel his warmth, the shift of his muscles under his skin.

her lips move, soundless as if she herself is straining to speak, but it's clear what she says: childe. ]

[Ajax is hardly worried about getting sick, happily bringing his face closer to hers as her hands give way. But the way her hand brush his jaw, how she trails her fingers down his chest gives him pause. He'd intended on pressing inward for another kiss, but he stops, eyes scanning her own features as his breath gets caught in his chest.

He's not sure he knows what he's feeling, a warmth that's bubbled up inside of him while he wasn't paying attention. He almost looks dumbfounded as he stares back at her, and it's then when she mouths that name that something in him seems to take over.

That haze is back, pushing forward to the surface and Ajax is powerless to stop it. His body moves, seemingly under his control but yet not at the same time, a hand snaking up into her hair as he lies there with her.]

Lumi...

[His voice is so small, he's never called her Lumi since he's met her, but it felt natural to use such a nickname with her. Like he had been for a while now, since he can remember...

He finally presses inward, taking her lips with his own as he kisses her deeply, like he hadn't been able to do so in hundreds of years, no, longer...]

[ it's a nickname that's only used by her brother and a handful of close friends. a few exes, maybe, but the way he says it is very different. almost like a call from someone who's known her for so long, who's spoken it so many times that it's the only acceptable way of saying that name. it's music to her ears, a melody from a thousand years ago.

her only response to his whisper is also a single phrase—at last—as she allows him to sweep her with his kiss, her eyes fluttering close. she can taste the bittersweet aftertaste of tea on his tongue, sharp but warm, inviting.

lumine shifts closer to him, her hands cupping his face and her fingers sinking and curling into his hair. kissing him feels like breathing, like air that's been denied from her for so long. all she can do is savour him until her lungs start to burn, her breath starts to catch in her throat. she only breaks the kiss for a brief moment, eyes opening at half-mast to look at his face, before she leans in again for another. ]

Are you sure we're still taking a nap today? [ she murmurs against his lips, looking at him through her lashes. ] I think you're fully awake now.

[The gradual switch completes on that soft phrase, that at last they finally had each other again, and Childe loses himself completely under her touch. Every part of him aches, tangling his legs with hers as he deepens their kiss, refusing to break until he's forced to, breathless as they part. What he wouldn't give to be able to lie here forever, finally back in the company of the woman he'd fallen in love with so long ago.

She catches him for another kiss and he gladly obliges, lips soft against his own, making his chest tighten and his mind go sideways. She'd always known how to kiss him in ways that made his mind spin, that left him at her whims and he'd never deny them. Childe only gazes back through heavy-lidded eyes, sighing with content.]

Sorry it took so long. I don't know how long I have, so perhaps that nap can wait. There's still...quite a ways to go.

[Now, his hand wanders downward, to slip underneath her dress, tugging lightly at the undergarments there.]

But I think I can hold on for long enough.

[ she arches into his touch, letting out a quiet sigh when she feels his hands slip into her dress. they trail heat across her skin, drawing invisible lines of affection and desire that only she can parse. she's missed this, she's missed him, even with her present self's growing feelings towards ajax. she knows that lumine still has a lot of uncertainty and still wishes to be her own self, completely separate from her.

it's something that she doesn't want to deny her counterpart who deserves to live her own life, but she's waited for so long for this. ]

Is he giving you problems? [ lumine asks with a laugh, kissing him again. slowly, gently, wanting the kiss to last longer this time. ] Lumine isn't too different from him, I have to say.

[ even more stubborn than her, looks like it, and clearly headstrong that the current aether is unable to rein her in. then again, her own twin brother had never really managed to do the same with her so even back then; she supposes that that's the always going to be the fate of their twin.

her own fingers trace lines on his body, nails gently scraping smooth, mildly blemished skin, where she remembers his old scars used to be. ]

Mm, Ajax needs a little bit more work.

[Those undergarments really need to go, and he works a little faster as she arches into his touch. It's been far too long since he's been able to spend any amount of time with her, to have her at his side as she used to be, and now he has this small opportunity to be with her again. It takes everything he has not to let his heart race too quickly, but her kiss drags him back down under her whims as they always have.

He finally manages to slip them down to her ankles, shifting to push her onto her back as he leads one of her hands towards his zipper.]

Let's not wish to beat up my new body too much, [he says with a small laugh, knowing full well that the scar that used to adorn his body wasn't there anymore.]

He's fighting it, and he's warding me off sometimes too. I'll commend his willpower to do so, but, well. I can't say I blame him, either.

[He leans down to take her in another kiss, deep and slow, before breaking to look back down at her. She's beautiful, exactly how he remembers her. There was something about how the soft sweeps of her golden hair always rendered him breathless, and now is no exception.]

Maybe we should have told them.

[ her fingers deftly unbutton and unzip his pants, hand slipping in past its waistband. her other hand guides him back under her skirt, gasping softly against his mouth when calloused fingers brush against her folds, evoking memories and images of their intimate time together long ago. they were often brief, a moment's interlude from their busy lives, but there's no one else that lumine would share them with. ]

Do you think that would have helped? [ she pants softly as her own hand wraps around him, his skin searing her palm. ] Lumine isn't exactly ... welcoming of the idea ...

[ of the both of them becoming one, fearing that she would lose herself in the process. she can feel her fighting hard against her, putting up walls around her heart as if that would stop the feelings from building, from growing. it won't; she can feel the way lumine's heart races when ajax touches her, heat rising in her cheeks.

she tilts her chin upward to catch childe's mouth again, the soft kiss they shared slowly growing hungry, desperate. they don't know how much time they have for themselves. ]

Childe—

[Childe lets out a sharp hiss as her hand grasps him, hardening more under her grip as he falls to his knees to let her lead his hand under her dress. Despite the gradual passing of time, it seems as if it had only been a mere amount of days since he last pleasured her so- her moans and whines an echo in his ears from days past, ones he savored and will do so again. He slides his fingers into her, heat wrapping around them as he coaxes her slowly into the intimacy that they shared a millennia ago.]

I'm not sure, [he admits, her mouth catching his before can continue. Childe's mind swirls with the hunger he shares for her, feeling himself slowly get swept away with her will- knowing full well that it won't be long before they lose their strength to keep some kind of modicum of control.

It's almost as if he can feel Ajax pressing back on him for control, but it's not quite the same as the possession that Yae had put upon him. Rather, it's a more shared experience, where Ajax swears that he too, is making the decision to slide his fingers in, searching for that spot that he knows Lumine loves so much. That he also is the one who is trying to slide his own pants and underwear off with his other hand, to ready himself to fill Lumine with all the love he has for her.]

Lumine, [Childe whispers, pressing another hungry kiss to her mouth.] I love you so much...

[Pulling his fingers out, he guides himself towards and inside her, the warmth of her sex welcoming him like the lover who had finally returned after so long, letting every pump cloud his mind over with amorous pleasure as he finally is allowed this short, intimate moment with the woman he's loved for a thousand years.]

[ his words fill her with hundreds of years of emotion and affection that it's overwhelming. tears prickle at the corner of her eyes, blur her sight as she watches him slowly unravel in her arms. her chest hurts, glass seemingly pumping through her bloodstream as her heart beats hard, shortens her breath. and time seems to stop for the two of them as they both chase each other's pleasure, finally one again when he sinks in.

childe. ajax.

she calls out his name again and again like a mantra, a prayer. each murmur against his lips is full of love, longing, and desire for the man she's fought the gods side-by-side with. there's no one else she wants that very moment, no one else who could satisfy her.

lumine lets him use her as he pleases, allows him to explore her body as she does his. it's no different from mapping something familiar after years of forgetting, drawing images in her head of what she knows. she's relearning what makes him moan, what makes him shudder, and it's intoxicating. running her fingers through his hair, she draws him closer, pressing her forehead against him. ]

I love you ... [ she breathes the words as she drowns in the depths of his eyes. ] I love you so much, Ajax ...

[ it's several hours later when lumine stirs, moonbeams filtering through the glass panels of her balcony's sliding door. she doesn't dare move, her entire body feeling sore as if she's just been tossed across the room all over again. that, and it's a little difficult to move with a body pressed against her, warm and heavy like a weighted blanket.

she tries to shift from under ajax's arm, hoping to get it off of her without waking him up. a part of her wonders if aether has returned already. ]

Ajax, wake up, you big lug ...

[It had been a while since Ajax had slept so soundly, not even a dream to be had while he was passed out. The last thing he remembers is feelings of content, like he'd finally returned home from a long journey into the arms of the woman he loved so dearly, as he'd snuggled up to Lumine after they'd indulged in themselves. Echoes of her calling his name sound in his ears as he wakes, memory flickering back to how lost in her he was as she said his name over and over again, until reality slowly starts to set in.

It's dark, as his eyes flutter open sleepily to look at the woman he's in bed with, groaning as he makes sense of the world around him. His body felt like he'd already worked out, legs weak despite having time to let them rest.]

Mmmmm...I'm awake...

[Ajax rolls onto his back, feeling like he could of slept another few hours or so. The unfamiliar white ceiling greets him, and he remembers where he was- in Lumine's bed at her room in the inn.]

What time is it? It's already dark outside.

[ ajax pulling away gives her a bit of leeway and space to stretch and reach for her watch on the side table, squinting at its face in the dimness of her room. ]

A little past seven, [ she says with a quiet groan, falling back onto her pillow and closing her eyes. ] ... I should get up.

[ check if aether's returned, go through the work she was hoping to finish this afternoon. her stomach growls in complaint, reminding her that the only thing she's eaten for the day is a bite of the sushi and a few cups of tea. right, she should probably have dinner too.

truth be told, she doesn't want to get up, somehow feeling rested and yet still terribly exhausted. the fact that the other lumine took over the moment she's let her guard down, momentarily overwhelming her with feelings that clearly don't belong to her ... she bites her lower lip, pushing away the thoughts and images from her mind. whatever line she's previously drawn has been blurred away again, like images on the sand disturbed by the waves. ]

Do you want anything to eat?

[He too, is trying not to dwell too much on the events of the afternoon, though he finds it difficult not to replay parts of it in his mind. He wouldn't of thought if he pressed against her in that way, she'd...

Okay, he sits up now, rubbing his face, pushing that thought away. He's not too appreciative of Childe taking over when he felt like he was so close to being able to coax her into sex himself. But then, when he thinks deeper on it, the fact that the man was able to do that at all is unsettling. It's the second time now, and this time was much longer than the first- and almost as if he'd been possessed again. However, he can't say it was the same, and that fact alone made it even more disturbing.

Is he even the same person anymore?

As if on cue, his stomach rumbles a little after he shifts, realizing that he hasn't eaten since lunch. Which was then, twelve?]

I could go for a bite, [he replies, standing up in the darkness to search for where he'd thrown his clothing. He walks over to the wall, flipping the light switch, finally spotting his pants and underwear.]

Maybe getting something quick is a good idea. I don't think I'm in any shape to go out.

[ lumine flinches when he turns on the light, putting an arm over her eyes until they've managed to adjust to the sudden brightness. not that it's unappreciated as it wakes her up completely, banishing away any desire or attempt to fall back asleep, but he could at least give her a warning or ten.

for a moment, she glances at him to gesture at the menu sitting on the table and ask what he wants for dinner. but lumine immediately looks away, suddenly feeling embarrassed looking at his naked form. which is stupid, because it's not like this is the first time they've shared a bed together.

instead, she also tries to get up and pick up the phone, wrapping the sheets over her naked body. her legs feel like they're made of jelly, the inside of her thighs a complete mess. ]

I don't think they serve anything quick and easy ... [ considering the kind of place they're staying in. ] I'll give them a call and see what we can get. Can you, er ...

[ lumine pointedly glances at the sliding door on the other end of the room where a wall is supposed to be. ]

Check if Aether's back? He might want dinner, too.

[Ajax snatches his pants and undergarments from the floor, about to put them on when he notices how she looks away, averts her gaze from him when she realizes that he's naked. Now that's funny, he thinks, as he tosses his clothing on the end of the bed instead. He grabs the menu off of the table, walking over to her to press himself against her back as he holds the menu in front of her for the both of them to look at.]

In a moment.

[He says, voice amused at her embarrassment.]

Haha, Lumine, why did you turn your head so suddenly just now? Surely it wasn't because of me, was it?

[ lumine nearly jumps in surprise when she suddenly feels his presence behind her, his body pressed against her once more. it's a familiar gesture, his heat permeating through the fabric of the sheets, but something totally unwelcome and distracting that very moment when she's busy trying to gather her composure. that, and she can tell that he's trying to get her agitated again.

she takes a deep breath, keeping her eyes focused on the menu and pushing down any warmth from rising up her cheeks. ]

Of course, it wasn't because of you. [ self-centred much?? her entire world doesn't revolve around him, please. for him to make such assumptions— ] I just wanted to get out of bed and get something to eat.

[ she gives it one long beat before she glances up at him, lips pressed together. ]

I thought you're hungry, too.

I am.

[He answers quickly, letting himself lean down a little to let his head droop near hers, his other arm coming around her to point at the menu. He reads it, pretending like he's trying to consider what he wants off of it, knowing full well that she's probably getting a little flustered with him. It's the point, and it will always be really cute to him how she tries to fend him off.]

Can I have this? [He points to a wrap on the menu, something small and light for just waking up.] With a pickle? And some water.

[Ajax pointedly doesn't move away from her though once he's finished telling her what he wants, acting as innocent as he can about it.]

[ he could've easily told her this from a few feet away with his pants on. but clearly, ajax's here to annoy her so late in the day, rubbing her embarrassment in her face. lumine's not going to give him that satisfaction, though, letting out a huff and pretending she doesn't notice that he's leaned in closer as she reaches out for the phone and dials the number for the front desk.

it's really a good thing that she's sensible enough to wrap something around her. at least that would keep her own body from betraying her so openly, as it's wont to do when he's around. ]

Ajax, you're heavy, [ she grumbles after she finally puts the phone down, the receptionist cheerily saying goodbye. ] I need to go to the bathroom. Childe made a complete mess out of me.

[ and she needs to clean up!! make sure she's at least presentable when the food and/or aether arrives!! and also, take meds just in case!! honestly ... ]

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