insurmountable | i'm dragging a heart that weighs a ton / holding out for not just anyone

[ it wouldn't surprise her if her brother showed up earlier as usual to spite them. it also wouldn't surprise her if that's something aether has planned, if only to somehow get back at her for the conversation earlier despite her attempt to defuse it. a number of people often compare the two of them for their differences, but they couldn't be more similar in certain aspects.

her lips thin as her eyes flutter close instinctively, unable to hold back that creeping, spreading desire to crawl back into his arms. it's overwhelming, enough to cow her sometimes into submission. it doesn't help either that what he's doing feels good. ]

After last time, [ in the training room underground, behind closed doors, ] who knows if you'll suddenly yield and admit defeat again?

[ if he'll suddenly lose his mind and it's a repeat of last week all over again. ]

I'm just covering all bases here.

Would you be so upset if I did?

[He says, tone light yet unyielding at the moment while he continues to knead his fingers in, moving from her shoulders to her neck. Ajax's thumbs pay special attention to her now, while he takes her earlobe in between his teeth and pulls ever so slightly on it.

That familiar swirl of want bundles in his chest, but he fights it off. It would be too easy now to give in.]

I think you enjoyed it. I wouldn't make it easy for you though, if that's what you prefer.

[His mind does wander for a moment, thinking if this is a good idea or not. Maybe it's not. But maybe they'd be done and back into their clothes long before Aether shows up.]

[ her breath catches in her throat when his teeth tug on her earlobe, her fingers curling around his wrist. but it's not an attempt to stop him, the action simply anchoring herself to her sanity before she gets swept away by him. that's never happened before and that's not happening now.

lumine sighs softly when his hands find a particularly stubborn knot at the base of her neck, his fingers gently coaxing it to soften and relax underneath her skin. something warm runs down her spine, sending a shiver through her body. ]

You shouldn't say something that you'll eventually have to regret later on.

[ let's be real, he'll be buckling under her touch in under a few minutes or so. he didn't take a lot of time last time, after all. ]

That sounded like a challenge.

[He can feel her whole body start to relax under his massaging, pleased when that knot finally gets worked out. The shiver it sends through her makes his eyes widen, a sly smile on his face, pondering his next move. He moves himself around the chair to the other side, gently pressing kisses to her neck, one hand lifting her chin gently as he leans forward to kiss across the front.]

You seem so relaxed now, Lumine.

[He pulls back and practically breathes it into the shell of her ear, hard to keep control of himself as it was- she was right there and he has complete access to her. Every curve, every inch of sensitive skin easily within his reach, it's maddening to him now. But he can't let her know that...

This was a challenge, after all, and he can't play all his cards right away. He knows she'll take advantage of it the minute she sees it.]

[ even with her mind clouded, lumine can tell he's trying to play the same game she's played with him last week. she's not like him who easily melts like putty after a touch or two. but she's not going to deny that it feels good, his breath warm on her skin, his touch gentle and soothing. her breath hitches once more when he trails kisses along her neck, teeth worrying her lip.

the problem with ajax, though, is that he always thinks he has the upper hand. that his teasing, his ribbing, his goading is enough to get a lead on her. that she'll be very open and vocal in wanting him. ]

While you still seemed tensed, Ajax.

[ her own hand snakes along the hand holding her chin, fingers trailing slowly as they trace the length of his arm and the line of his shoulder, the touch feather-light. she shifts in her seat as well, lets the hand on her neck dip just a little lower down, enough for his fingertips to brush against bare skin that's been warmed by his ministrations. she moves her head, tilts it enough that his lips brush against her ear—

but the moment her own fingers brush the edge of his collar, kissing the exposed skin of his neck, she pulls it back and yawns. ]

I'm getting sleepy. We should go nap.

[It's almost as if there's small sparks of electricity that run through him at the feather-light touch, interested in what she's trying to do to him. It almost tickles, the tease against his neck, leaving him with a want for her hand to continue to explore when she pulls it back. Ajax bites his tongue, to keep himself from asking for her to reach back up and let her fingers wander along his neck.

He doesn't speak to his own state of being, tense or not- instead, he acquiesces to her, rounding the chair to stand in front of her and reaches for her hand.]

That is what I was suggesting earlier.

[A nap. A nap that now involves him pulling her upward, out of the chair and into him, a hand running through her hair before he begins to lead her by the hand over to the bed.]

Come, I think now is a great chance to unwind a little bit, don't you think?

[ touching her is really a bad idea, especially when he's the one initiating this game of chicken between the two of them. he should know by now that he'll probably lose and he'll lose badly. the worst thing that could happen too is for him to be found by her twin brother, not just his men.

she threads her fingers between his as he leads her towards the bed, her hand squeezing his hand ever so gently. very innocent, and yet, can be misconstrued as intentional—and then, lumine slowly untangles their fingers, pulling her hand away as she moves towards the bed. ]

Not my fault your suggestions don't always go as planned.

[ does he want a list of plans that went awry in the last few months they've known each other? ]

[He knows well he might lose, however, he will still enjoy how her hand squeezes his ever so gently. How he feels a pull back to her once she releases and untangles her fingers from his. Sneaky tactic, but still welcome.

So, he begins to unbutton the white dress shirt he has on, slipping it off and hanging it on the back of a chair before coming over to the bed himself. She's already seen him like this, of course, a mild amount of scars on his body that mar the chiseled muscle underneath. The consequences of a bad hit, or a fight that broke out during an operation of sorts- things that are almost unavoidable in his line of work.]

Unforeseen circumstances pop up from time to time. I'd like to think most of my plans go pretty smoothly, but for some reason, they don't when you're involved.

[He grins at her, plopping himself down on one side of the bed, leaning back against the headboard.]

I can't say it doesn't make it a little more exciting, though, haha.

[ lumine sits on the other side of the bed, her back turned to him as she removes the ring from her finger and unclasps the watch from her wrist, depositing it on the side table. she makes it an excruciatingly, deliberately slow process, almost like a ritual of sorts. make him wait, make him squirm until he can't take it anymore. ]

Is that your way of telling me that I'm just that good at disrupting your plans?

[ and maybe she should do more of it for the sake of everyone, especially her sanity? what an excellent idea that is, she thinks.

she reaches out behind her, grabbing one of the pillows next to him and setting it lengthwise between the two of them. a fluffy line or wall of sorts, one that keeps them separate as she crawls onto the bed and lies down on her side, her back still towards him. ]

Unlike me with you, you just can't seem to predict these unforeseen circumstances with me, can you?

[Ajax is a very patient man. He sees exactly what she's doing, sitting there watching her as she takes her adornments off and lies down. He keeps his poker face up when she puts the pillow between them, as if they were high school kids on a trip. Snorting, he picks the pillow up and tosses it to the end of the bed, scooting himself over with his own pillow to lie down and press his chest to her back.

His face comes to rest near the nape of her neck, letting his arm drape over her side. This stubborn woman, he wouldn't have it any other way.]

I guess not, [he responds, amused.] But I don't mind it. It's as I said- it makes things a little more interesting.

[He plants a soft kiss to her neck, before nuzzling his head into it.]

I'm not sure how I got so lucky.

[ lumine quickly notices the shift in the mattress, his weight pressing down as he moves closer, looking over her shoulder to see the pillow being tossed aside. ]

Hey—

[ but she turns back around when ajax presses himself against her, his arm slipping over her waist. she can feel the heat of his body emanating from his bare skin and seeping into the thin fabric of her dress, almost like her personal hot water bottle. it feels nice, soothing despite the cool air brushing over her skin from the air-conditioning. her eyes flutter close, lips pressing together when she feels his mouth on her nape. ]

I don't know if it's something that I'd call luck, [ she retorts with an inward roll of her eye. ] You don't bulldoze your way into a person's life and call it luck.

[ because isn't that what he's been doing to her lately? he's just everywhere in her life, orbiting her like some prodigal planet that's returned home. in a way ... isn't that how it is?

her hand slips into his once more, fingers tangling with his to keep it from moving further from her side. keep him in place, as one would say. ]

You sure you didn't enjoy kissing Aether yesterday?

[A soft laugh emits from him, the thought of him bulldozing into her life. He would hardly describe it as such, thinking back to the coincidence after coincidence leading up to this point.]

You say bulldozing, but perhaps it was just fate, haha.

[He seems to sink into her as she tangles her hand with his, his body relaxing completely against her like a tightly wound wire that was finally being unwound. Ajax can already feel his cares drifting away, holding her in his arms as he lets his lips brush against her soft skin as he speaks.]

What kiss. Did you mean these ones?

[Determined not to let the thought of kissing her brother ruin what's in his pants right now, he begins to plant more slow, deliberate kisses to the back of her neck and shoulder blade. Though his hand is trapped by her own, his arm still pulls her inward to him, craving more of her against him. Her warmth lulls him into a sort of fog, where instincts begin to take over rather than logic.]

[ what happened to his game of chicken! what happened to taking a nap!!

lumine squeezes her eyes shut, lower lip between her teeth, as he leaves more kisses on her neck and shoulder. and in his wake, heat seems to bloom where his lips brush against her skin, spreading and radiating throughout her body and settling somewhere deep inside her, until she's just had enough. how are they supposed to rest like this?

she turns around in his arms, pressing her hands once more over his mouth. ]

What happened to your suggestion of resting for a bit? [ she refuses to accept that she's at fault for derailing this idea. ] Are you yielding?

[Ajax's eyes flash in amusement at her, he was wondering when she'd figure out that he decided to play a completely different game than he was. He traps her hands against his mouth, kissing her palms while he gazes back at her from behind her own hands.]

Aren't we resting right now? I'm quite relaxed.

[Is the muffled response, his eyes fluttering closed as he continues to kiss her palms, sighing with content between each press.]

Is it yielding, or just changing the rules of the game?

[ somehow, this sudden turn of events is no longer surprising to her. it's frustrating, as everything related to him is normally frustrating, but it's unsurprising at the same time. his manipulations know no bounds, matching her step for step—at times, even managing to getting ahead of her despite her advantage. that's just how ajax is, never playing fair, much to her dismay.

how annoying, she thinks as her hand instinctively shift against his lips with every kiss he presses against her palm. it's ticklish, to say the least, painting a bit of colour in her cheeks as he continues his ministrations. ]

You don't even know what I did with my hands today ...

[ she could've picked up something dirty early before meeting up with yae. he doesn't know!! ]

Hahahaha...

[The laugh is tinged with hints of the Harbinger that lies within him, relentless now, as he continues to enjoy her efforts to ward him off or get him to concede and stop. His hand leaves her own, to wrap his arm around her as he presses into her more, uncaring for wherever her hands were prior to his kisses. So adamant, she is, in trying to keep herself from being swayed by him. It's a delightful challenge to him, addictive almost.]

I never know what you do with your hands any day, [he counters, now attempting to press his face through her hands to get to her lips.] It's not as if it changes anything.

[Chuckling to himself again, he wonders how she let herself get in such a dangerous position with him. It's all too tempting to let his hand wander to other places, to coax her into letting her explore him as well. But he knows she might have something else up her sleeve, some willpower left to resist before that, so he has to hold off, despite the haze that begins to set in once again.

Something telling him exactly where to press, exactly where to touch. Not now, he thinks, this is too much fun.]

Until you get sick, that is.

[ ugh, how incorrigible. he's really never one to give up, isn't he?

though there's that sinking, familiar feeling in that laugh of his, in the way he insists gently but firmly that she can't seem to brush off, something that makes her chest squeeze tightly, her heart working hard for every beat. it's just like that instance in snezhnaya before it all went up in smoke. so for one long moment, lumine keeps her hands pressed against his mouth and face, before ever so slowly, she lowers them.

her fingers brush against his jaw, tracing its hard edge and following its line until they trail down his neck and chest. pulled against him, she can feel his warmth, the shift of his muscles under his skin.

her lips move, soundless as if she herself is straining to speak, but it's clear what she says: childe. ]

[Ajax is hardly worried about getting sick, happily bringing his face closer to hers as her hands give way. But the way her hand brush his jaw, how she trails her fingers down his chest gives him pause. He'd intended on pressing inward for another kiss, but he stops, eyes scanning her own features as his breath gets caught in his chest.

He's not sure he knows what he's feeling, a warmth that's bubbled up inside of him while he wasn't paying attention. He almost looks dumbfounded as he stares back at her, and it's then when she mouths that name that something in him seems to take over.

That haze is back, pushing forward to the surface and Ajax is powerless to stop it. His body moves, seemingly under his control but yet not at the same time, a hand snaking up into her hair as he lies there with her.]

Lumi...

[His voice is so small, he's never called her Lumi since he's met her, but it felt natural to use such a nickname with her. Like he had been for a while now, since he can remember...

He finally presses inward, taking her lips with his own as he kisses her deeply, like he hadn't been able to do so in hundreds of years, no, longer...]

[ it's a nickname that's only used by her brother and a handful of close friends. a few exes, maybe, but the way he says it is very different. almost like a call from someone who's known her for so long, who's spoken it so many times that it's the only acceptable way of saying that name. it's music to her ears, a melody from a thousand years ago.

her only response to his whisper is also a single phrase—at last—as she allows him to sweep her with his kiss, her eyes fluttering close. she can taste the bittersweet aftertaste of tea on his tongue, sharp but warm, inviting.

lumine shifts closer to him, her hands cupping his face and her fingers sinking and curling into his hair. kissing him feels like breathing, like air that's been denied from her for so long. all she can do is savour him until her lungs start to burn, her breath starts to catch in her throat. she only breaks the kiss for a brief moment, eyes opening at half-mast to look at his face, before she leans in again for another. ]

Are you sure we're still taking a nap today? [ she murmurs against his lips, looking at him through her lashes. ] I think you're fully awake now.

[The gradual switch completes on that soft phrase, that at last they finally had each other again, and Childe loses himself completely under her touch. Every part of him aches, tangling his legs with hers as he deepens their kiss, refusing to break until he's forced to, breathless as they part. What he wouldn't give to be able to lie here forever, finally back in the company of the woman he'd fallen in love with so long ago.

She catches him for another kiss and he gladly obliges, lips soft against his own, making his chest tighten and his mind go sideways. She'd always known how to kiss him in ways that made his mind spin, that left him at her whims and he'd never deny them. Childe only gazes back through heavy-lidded eyes, sighing with content.]

Sorry it took so long. I don't know how long I have, so perhaps that nap can wait. There's still...quite a ways to go.

[Now, his hand wanders downward, to slip underneath her dress, tugging lightly at the undergarments there.]

But I think I can hold on for long enough.

[ she arches into his touch, letting out a quiet sigh when she feels his hands slip into her dress. they trail heat across her skin, drawing invisible lines of affection and desire that only she can parse. she's missed this, she's missed him, even with her present self's growing feelings towards ajax. she knows that lumine still has a lot of uncertainty and still wishes to be her own self, completely separate from her.

it's something that she doesn't want to deny her counterpart who deserves to live her own life, but she's waited for so long for this. ]

Is he giving you problems? [ lumine asks with a laugh, kissing him again. slowly, gently, wanting the kiss to last longer this time. ] Lumine isn't too different from him, I have to say.

[ even more stubborn than her, looks like it, and clearly headstrong that the current aether is unable to rein her in. then again, her own twin brother had never really managed to do the same with her so even back then; she supposes that that's the always going to be the fate of their twin.

her own fingers trace lines on his body, nails gently scraping smooth, mildly blemished skin, where she remembers his old scars used to be. ]

Mm, Ajax needs a little bit more work.

[Those undergarments really need to go, and he works a little faster as she arches into his touch. It's been far too long since he's been able to spend any amount of time with her, to have her at his side as she used to be, and now he has this small opportunity to be with her again. It takes everything he has not to let his heart race too quickly, but her kiss drags him back down under her whims as they always have.

He finally manages to slip them down to her ankles, shifting to push her onto her back as he leads one of her hands towards his zipper.]

Let's not wish to beat up my new body too much, [he says with a small laugh, knowing full well that the scar that used to adorn his body wasn't there anymore.]

He's fighting it, and he's warding me off sometimes too. I'll commend his willpower to do so, but, well. I can't say I blame him, either.

[He leans down to take her in another kiss, deep and slow, before breaking to look back down at her. She's beautiful, exactly how he remembers her. There was something about how the soft sweeps of her golden hair always rendered him breathless, and now is no exception.]

Maybe we should have told them.

[ her fingers deftly unbutton and unzip his pants, hand slipping in past its waistband. her other hand guides him back under her skirt, gasping softly against his mouth when calloused fingers brush against her folds, evoking memories and images of their intimate time together long ago. they were often brief, a moment's interlude from their busy lives, but there's no one else that lumine would share them with. ]

Do you think that would have helped? [ she pants softly as her own hand wraps around him, his skin searing her palm. ] Lumine isn't exactly ... welcoming of the idea ...

[ of the both of them becoming one, fearing that she would lose herself in the process. she can feel her fighting hard against her, putting up walls around her heart as if that would stop the feelings from building, from growing. it won't; she can feel the way lumine's heart races when ajax touches her, heat rising in her cheeks.

she tilts her chin upward to catch childe's mouth again, the soft kiss they shared slowly growing hungry, desperate. they don't know how much time they have for themselves. ]

Childe—

[Childe lets out a sharp hiss as her hand grasps him, hardening more under her grip as he falls to his knees to let her lead his hand under her dress. Despite the gradual passing of time, it seems as if it had only been a mere amount of days since he last pleasured her so- her moans and whines an echo in his ears from days past, ones he savored and will do so again. He slides his fingers into her, heat wrapping around them as he coaxes her slowly into the intimacy that they shared a millennia ago.]

I'm not sure, [he admits, her mouth catching his before can continue. Childe's mind swirls with the hunger he shares for her, feeling himself slowly get swept away with her will- knowing full well that it won't be long before they lose their strength to keep some kind of modicum of control.

It's almost as if he can feel Ajax pressing back on him for control, but it's not quite the same as the possession that Yae had put upon him. Rather, it's a more shared experience, where Ajax swears that he too, is making the decision to slide his fingers in, searching for that spot that he knows Lumine loves so much. That he also is the one who is trying to slide his own pants and underwear off with his other hand, to ready himself to fill Lumine with all the love he has for her.]

Lumine, [Childe whispers, pressing another hungry kiss to her mouth.] I love you so much...

[Pulling his fingers out, he guides himself towards and inside her, the warmth of her sex welcoming him like the lover who had finally returned after so long, letting every pump cloud his mind over with amorous pleasure as he finally is allowed this short, intimate moment with the woman he's loved for a thousand years.]

[ his words fill her with hundreds of years of emotion and affection that it's overwhelming. tears prickle at the corner of her eyes, blur her sight as she watches him slowly unravel in her arms. her chest hurts, glass seemingly pumping through her bloodstream as her heart beats hard, shortens her breath. and time seems to stop for the two of them as they both chase each other's pleasure, finally one again when he sinks in.

childe. ajax.

she calls out his name again and again like a mantra, a prayer. each murmur against his lips is full of love, longing, and desire for the man she's fought the gods side-by-side with. there's no one else she wants that very moment, no one else who could satisfy her.

lumine lets him use her as he pleases, allows him to explore her body as she does his. it's no different from mapping something familiar after years of forgetting, drawing images in her head of what she knows. she's relearning what makes him moan, what makes him shudder, and it's intoxicating. running her fingers through his hair, she draws him closer, pressing her forehead against him. ]

I love you ... [ she breathes the words as she drowns in the depths of his eyes. ] I love you so much, Ajax ...

[ it's several hours later when lumine stirs, moonbeams filtering through the glass panels of her balcony's sliding door. she doesn't dare move, her entire body feeling sore as if she's just been tossed across the room all over again. that, and it's a little difficult to move with a body pressed against her, warm and heavy like a weighted blanket.

she tries to shift from under ajax's arm, hoping to get it off of her without waking him up. a part of her wonders if aether has returned already. ]

Ajax, wake up, you big lug ...

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